“Is this really what I want?” some days the question hits home hard, and sometimes it’s just a passing thought. But the feeling is there. The uncertainty.
I know this feeling is not unique to me but what’s not normal is, I often think that it is totally okay if this is the rest of my life. It’s perfectly normal to let your soul die. It’s what our parents did, right?
I’m not saying I hate my job, because I don’t, but I think I’m neutral to it. I like my team, I enjoy my work life balance, but I am not THRILLED about creating a print ad for a magazine. Instead, I find myself daydreaming about my dog.
Work is work, right?
So then I think, HOBBIES. Feed the soul outside of work!
But what are hobbies that I’m into? If a hobby is an activity done regularly in one’s leisure time for pleasure, then mine would be watching TV and eating oreos. God I suck. Everyday I vow that I will come home after work and read more, take cool photos, go on mini adventures! (fuck you instagram! just kidding I love you) — something other than sit down and watch tv. Sometimes we try to make a nicer dinner or sit outside and read but sometimes I JUST DON’T FEEL LIKE IT.
Goddamn, I’m tired.